After staying at home for almost a week, I decided to go out to get some fresh air! Not to forget, today is the birthday of The God Of Mercy! So, I went to the temple around town. Just when I was stepping to the ground of the temple, WOW!!! Not even a space for me to squeeze in (may be a little bit of exaggerating)! People were holding joysticks, one lady was distributing money in a form of red packet to the beggars. While she was doing, one guy, probably her relative/son/assistant keep on snapping pictures of her distributing those red packets.
Thoughts: Help never come without string attached. Taking pictures of you doing a good deed?
I continued to squeeze my way through the crowds. Finally, I managed to get inside the temple. I knelt in front of The God Of Mercy and make my prayers. Well, there was then this aunty, walking to and flo in front of me. I understand the fact that she had to do so since it was really crowded. Half way through my prayers, I earned an ELBOW from her!
She hit my left eye with her ELBOW! Supposingly, I should be angry and stare at her yet I didn’t (which was strange, perhaps EQ is increasing 😛 ). I was glad that my spec didn’t broke. Maybe that would hit my threshold to just GRRRRRRR back at her. Despite all these battle my way through the crowd and the elbow incident, I’m happy that I can finish my prayers 😀
Right after the prayers, I went to one of my favourite place, Tzu Chi Cafe. I decided to go as to get some different environment for my revision after so many days at home. It was really a nice place because the environment is quiet and nobody talk loud like how it used to be when I was at Starbuck/Coffee Bean.
Every day at 1:30pm, the volunteers in the cafe will have a simple prayers as well. After the prayers, one of the volunteer would share a story. This is the main point of my Special Friday. The story that was shared today:
There was this father who was very angry at his daughter because whatever advices that he gave her, she would ignore it. No matter how hard the father try to stop his daughter from doing something, the daughter will sure do it anyway. So, he felt very upset as he might fail on guiding his child to the correct pathway. Fearing of this, he came to a counsellor, hoping to get some advice. After hearing his explanation of the situation, the counsellor shared a story instead of giving advice right away.
Counsellor: Days back, people use donkey as one of their transportation and loading of goods. As we know, donkeys are quite stubborn animal. Whenever they slow down, when the owner beat them very hard or push them, they won’t move at all, not even a step! At once, there was a man who never face such problem before. His donkey do whatever his master command him. People felt strange and ask him, how he train his donkey that he never had to face difficulty in commanding the donkey. So he told that whenever the donkey slow down or start to disobey the commands, he would grab some dirts on the ground and put it into the donkey’s mouth.
Until this part, the father was puzzled and ask why did the man do so? So the counsellor explained, ” When a child is angry, we try so hard, even scold them for the mistake they done. We were so harsh on them at the place because we fear that if we don’t do so, they will did the mistake again. What the man do to the donkey is to divert the donkey’s attention. By putting dirt into its mouth, he is actually diverting the donkey’s attention from being stubborn. The same goes with parenting. It is pointless to be harsh at first place when both of the parents and child were angry. What we can do is give a task for the children to do at that point as this will divert their attention from angry. When angry emotion ceases, thats when we start to give advice and explain their mistake to them. ”
The reason why people start to hate each other even more after an arguments is because we don’t realised the fact that during the arguments, we were too blinded by angriness, dissatisfaction, cannot-afford-to-lose-emotion. In the end, all the vulgar words which are hurtful will come out and hatred develop. Its already hard to dissolve angriness, what more hatreds?
Calm ourselves down when we know arguments are about to begin. Have a nice talk after the negative feeling subside.
That’s all for today 😀