The truth is, I will be remaining at how I feel right now for some time. I’ve reached a point where I felt it doesn’t matter how the thing will work out eventually in future. I’m no longer rushing to the destination that I’ve always will and always wanted to at the very beginning when the thing started.
I started to believe time can change a person. Time is a very powerful transformation agent if you want me to describe its role. I remember I mentioned before in my previous post, no matter how strong a feeling or emotion you are in, with time goes on, you will able to experience how amazing time is in changing your emotion or feeling towards an even stronger one or a weaker one. That’s why I said, a feeling which can withstand the changes of time, is the truly strong feeling that you should value of.
I’m not in a hurry anymore. Well, it certainly doesn’t mean I gave up. I appreciate the journey and the process of it. Nothing is affecting my normal routine and my goals. It is a healthy feeling that I finally manage to achieve after years of learning.
I know it will be turn out to be 😀 So at the mean time, let the nature take its course.
It’s monday and it’s one o’clock in the afternoon. I’m sitting in the computer lab doing exactly “nothing” which I am still be able to say it out proudly right now. Many thoughts ran in my mind ever since Friday, or perhaps Saturday? Need a place to summarise it up. Here it goes:
1) I wonder my mum will be feeling bored at home without me? The day when I need to drag myself back to sp, thousand and thousand of reluctance crawl all over me. I wish I could just have one week of holiday to spend at home until she can resume her daily routine.
2) Is my stamina going down the hill? Opening the reference book, I can barely read few pages and my vision field already went smaller! Books are such a good hynoptic! I need to get my engine to work before starting my posting. I certainly would feel bad bringing an empty mind to the hospital.
3) I need to get my reference books done by today! At least I should buy those surgery and pediatric books. Can you tell me the author for the OBGY book that you recommend me ah bro!
There is actually another piece of thoughts left to be mentioned here. (A short pause as I was distracted by A PERSON ) This last piece of thought is hard to be put into words. Perhaps I have yet to arrange it or should I say I fail to do so. But one thing that I realised is, I will never place myself into such situation again for the sake of my own self. I should be able to control it. Time is always good in doing its magical work 🙂
Thank You 🙂